Quiet Time On This Sunday Morning.

It's funny how as we get older we realize things about ourselves. I mean, I have been "me" my whole life, you would like I would know everything about "me" by now. Apparently not.

See, it started yesterday. I woke up around 6:30am and was feeling rather refreshed (which is NOT normal} for me. I decided that instead of lying there and forcing myself into those past few moments of sleep, that I would get up, make a fresh pot of coffee, and tidy the house up a bit before the human tornadoes I named Chloe and Hunter rose from their slumber.

And ya'll, it was QUIET. And, it was fulfilling. And, it was stress free. And I ashamed it admit I was a bit disappointed when they awoke around 7am. Don't get me wrong, I love spending the mornings with my children. For me, those are the most precious moments. For just the first hour or so of he morning, they are SWEET.

Please don't misunderstand me, I do have charming children most of the time. Well, let's get serious, I have an angelic 13 month old baby boy who is delightful most of the time. THEN, I have a 4.5 year old daughter who acts just like her mother 99% of the time, and that is all I will say about that for fear of losing what few blogging friends I do have.

OK, so I went off on a tangent there. The point is, I enjoyed yesterday morning so much that when I stirred for the first time this morning around 6am, instead of going back to sleep, I got up and made a pot of coffee and enjoyed my "me" time. It is wonderful! I mean on the weekdays when I work, I can't do it but on the weekends this will definitely be my new routine from now on. It made me a much more pleasant mommy yesterday (and wife too) because before I could even ask for someone to give me a break, I had already had one!

It went on to be a fabulous family day with Chloe's soccer game and then my company picnic. Days like yesterday make me really appreciate my husband and children even more than I naturally do and I love feeling that way!!

So as I start my quiet morning today (well, it actually just ended because my sweet baby girl just walked from her room to the living room all sleepy-eyed, I will give thanks for all that I have and I will strive to make today even better than the pleasant day we had yesterday.

Mommy time in the morning helps that! And, you know it must be good to make me drag my derriere out of bed before absolutely necessary.

And now I must go, the rumblings from the bedrooms has begun. Mommy is ready to report to duty, already armed with two cups of coffee!

What about ya'll? How and when do you guys find time to yourself in order to keep yourself balanced?

Wishing you all a blesses Sunday.

Until next time...CNS

Fabulous Weekend

Hi! Sorry I haven't been blogging this week, I know you all are just plain devastated over it. But, things have been a little crazier than they normally are.



On Saturday, Chloe had her first game and she ROCKED it. She was awesome and we were so proud. She scored eight goals and the other team only scored two as a whole. We were so excited that she might have finally found her niche. One of the other moms came up to me and gave me the best compliment I could ever wish for as a mother. She said that it wasn't just that Chloe was talented at the game itself, but that she was such a good sport. She helped her teammates when they fell down (which at 4 years old, they did quite often) and she also tried to encourage her teammates have fun by passing them the ball and such, instead of hamming up the talent she exhibited and being a ball hog. I got all teary-eyed during that conversation because that is what I hoped to instill in my children;to be kind and compassionate to others. Hopefully, this is an indicator that she has adopted some of what we have tried to teach her.



Sunday was spent shopping at one of the best malls in the city with my hubby. My mom kept the kids and so we got some time alone. Add that with a trip to a spectacular mall and who could ask for more??



I have started my Christmas shopping and it is so stressful. I am always so worried that I won't buy the right thing. That the people I buy for won't enjoy their gift. That they will give that half fake smile all the while wondering, "what was she thinking?". I know, I know. That is so not the point of this holiday. But, I am the type of person that truly enjoys giving gifts. At times, I can barely stop myself from giving the gift before the upcoming occasion. Anyhow, I am super stoked about the holidays and hope that I am able to finish before the madness begins.

On Monday Hunter will have tubes put in his ears. This has been a long time coming since he has had a constant ear infection for the last 6 months. It was supposed to be done on the 15th of September but stupid Hurricane Ike ruined that. So, prayers would be nice.

Until next time...CNS

The Tale of a Champion - Hunter John

So, they say that writing can by therapeutic. For me, no truer words were ever spoken. I love the written word. I love to read. I am a great reader. I am a not so great writer. I am working on that.

What I am trying to say is, writing and getting things out make me feel better. So, today I decided to write the story of Hunter's birth. It is a sad and terrifying story with the happiest ending. You couldn't have paid someone top dollar to write a better ending. However, the story remains. Here it is...

For those of you that don't know, Hunter is my baby boy. He is 13 months old and he is the cutest baby on the face of this earth.

Anyway, when I was pregnant with Hunter, I was severely ill the entire time. I had the same issue with Chloe but this just "felt" different. I just had this "feeling" the whole time that it was much more than that. I can't put my finger on it, call it intuition.

And, being the vocal person that I am, I commented on it a lot. I said things like, "I feel like something is not right", "I am going to have this baby early, mark my words". The doctor basically ignored me. And why wouldn't he? I didn't have any real proof other that the thoughts and feelings in my head and heart.

Then, the swelling began. And ya'll, this wasn't no normal, preggo swelling. People would stop and stare. So, I waddled myself into the doctor's office fully expecting to be put on bed rest. Nope. He looked at me like I was crazy and said he knew it was uncomfortable but didn't see any problems with it. Man, I so wish I would have taken pics so that you guys could understand why I was so shocked when he blew me off that way.

Fast forward to Monday, September 10th. I was feeling ROTTEN. Just downright miserable. I spent all day at work and then came home and laid down. I just couldn't move. I started having mild contractions. But, at 7 months pregnant this wasn't anything that sent us running to the ER. I called my doctor's office to report feeling so ill and the contractions. They asked if I thought I was in labor. Ummm, if I knew that I wouldn't have called you, I would have gone to the ER. So, the answer is...I don't think so but I am not sure. She tells me to just lay around at home and go to the ER if my water breaks. Yes, I know what you are all thinking...Gosh, she was sooooo much help ;)

So, I get up on Tuesday morning. Tuesday, September 11th. I go to work because I have to run payroll but I am feeling even worse today than I was yesterday.

I get to work and begin running payroll but shortly after I begin to vomit. And, I CANNOT STOP for 3 hours. I have my door to my office closed this whole time so no one realizes how sick I am. Finally, around 2 o'clock my boss finds me and immediately tells me I need to get to the hospital. I calm him down, tell him that I have already called my little sister and she will be here in 20 minutes.

My sister gets here and we pick up Ray and head to the hospital. By this time, the vomiting is persisting and I am contracting regularly. Every 1.5 minutes. Oh my God, I am in full on labor at barely 7 months pregnant. How did this happen to me? What is going to happen to my baby? It is September 11th! I know, I know, the silliest thing to worry about at a time like this.

I got to the hospital at 4:30pm and Hunter was born via emergency c-section at 5:49pm. It was pure chaos once I arrived and they just needed to get him out, which is exactly what they did.

I knew I was in trouble when they pulled him out. I said, "Oh, he is beautiful and he has so much hair!". No response. Not from a doctor, not from a nurse, and not from the BABY. No crying.

Ya'll. That is the worst FEELING EVER.

"Why isn't my baby crying?"

"Honey, your baby is having a little trouble breathing. We have taken him away and your husband has gone with him."

That is the last thing I heard for the next THREE hours. Ray stayed while they hooked him up to machine after machine. He didn't want to leave his side and I would have been furious if he had, but, I had no idea what was going on with Hunter this entire time.

Then, Ray comes into the recovery room with the most stoic look on his face. I will never forget that look as long as I live. I asked how Hunter was. "It doesn't look good." That is all he said. And we both began to sob.

Hunter was born weighing in at 4lbs 12oz. Not too bad for a preemie. We have no idea how long he was because they didn't have time to measure. But, he was also born with severe Premature Lung Disease. His lungs just weren't ready. The doctors were hopeful at first. They treat this type of thing all of the time. When they took him from Ray they put him in Level II NICU. That is for sick babies that do not have central lines in their belly and alot of times it is merely a precaution. Within an hour, Hunter had to be moved to Level III NICU where the sickest of the sick babies are. He wasn't breathing on his own at all. They had to put him on a ventilator. Oh Dear God. How did this happen?

By the next morning, Hunter has steadily deteriorated. He would not respond to treatment. Nothing. The meds weren't helping his little body heal. He just wouldn't get better. Why? They had no idea and that scared them. Terrified us.

By the time he was 24 hours old, his lungs stopped working at all and he was not only no longer taking in oxygen, he lungs were now refusing to expel Carbon Monoxide and they were also still resisting treatment. He wasn't getting better at all, he continued to decline and they prepared us for the worst.

I wouldn't believe it. I couldn't believe it. No. I . would. not. let. that. happen.

I could go on for days but to summarize for 6 straight days he laid there with no improvement and they couldn't figure out why. Why wouldn't he respond to the treatment? Why wouldn't his little body heal. He was a fighter. That much was clear. He had been fighting to stay alive for 6 longs days but he just wasn't improving and before long we would have to "make a decision". No. Not going to happen.

Then, they had to discharge me. The doctor had held them at bay for as long as possible. The day was finally here. I ha d to leave the hospital without my newborn. I forever left a piece of my at that hospital that day. I swear I will never get that tiny slice of my heart back.

That must have been the motivation that little sucker needed. I called to check in on him that night and they said they were able to lower the oxygen they were giving him for the first time in 6 days. They were going from 100% go 90%. Still far from ideal but progress. Then, the next day when I went to see him he was down to 50%. Are you serious?????? Is he really? Don't get your hopes up because they have been crushed too many times over the last 7 days.

Well, that night when I went to see him, I called into the NICU to get permission to come in and they said that I couldn't because they were doing a procedure on Hunter. Oh no. What now? That normally meant another blood transfusion or spinal tap (he has 3 blood transfusions in his first 6 days of life). No, that wasn't it. They were REMOVING THE VENTILATOR. Hunter, my friends, was breathing room air. In 24 hours he went from 100% dependant on a ventilator to breathing room air!! I don't know if any of you know this, but that is nothing short of a miracle. It really isn't.

Ray, me and his mother wept tears of joy for hours in the hallway that night. We couldn't believe it. Our little fighter was going another round. He wasn't throwing in the towel just yet. Thank you , God. Thank You.

He still faced an uphill battle over the next 3 weeks. He had to learn to feed. He had to learn to self-regulate his body temp. It wasn't easy. He had a major setback at about 3 weeks. He was feeding off of a bottle for the first time and I was holding him and he began to seize. They don't know why. He had seizure activity in his brain up until we brought him home at 6 weeks old. They didn't know why. Maybe the spinal tap? Who know. All I knew was that even if it was a permanent condition, we would deal with it. As long as Hunter was alive, I would deal with anything. It didn't matter.

We took Hunter John home at 6 weeks old weighing a whopping 5lbs! He was so tiny! He just continued to thrive once he got home. He suffered no developmental delays at all which is a miracle in itself.

We had the follow up EEG at Texas Childrens on Dec 10th to see if he still had seizure activity in the brain. If he did, there was a good chance the condition was permanent. If he didn't, it was probably due to the trauma his body had suffered. We finished the procedure and they said they would call within the next 3 days with the results. We were all on pins and needles. THREE WHOLE DAYS! But, my pediatric neurologist was an angel. He called me that night at home at 9:30pm to tell me Hunter had NO seizure activity in the brain. He had fully recovered. We wept again. This little boy had defied all odds. He was our hero.

Today, Hunter is 13 months old and full of life. He is all boy! He has the most beautiful blue eyes you will ever see. His eyelashes make women all over the world shiver in envy. His laugh is infectious and he has completed our lives.

They say that God never gives you more than you can handle. There were times during his recovery (and lack thereof) where I questioned this. Why me? But, we are a stronger family because of it and we appreciate each day that we are given more than we ever have before. We have our son. He is happy and healthy. Nothing else matters....

Next post I will write about Chloe and her reaction to her sick baby brother...you will then understand why she will forever be my hero and my inspiration.

Hope I didn't ramble for too long.

Until next time...CNS

Our First Family Vacation...

So, this weekend Ray and I decided that it would be a great idea to take both kids to San Antonio for the weekend for our first "official" family vacation. I got a little bonus at work, and Ray has been working so hard with all of the hurricane work, we decided to treat ourselves and mostly the kids.


Oh, the visions of joy and greatness we had. This would be the best weekend vacation ever!!!! The kids would remember this for the rest of their lives! And more importantly, they would remember how hard their parents worked to afford this weekend at SeaWorld and The Riverwalk and therefore be reminded of how much they are loved.


Ha.


Double ha.


It started out on Saturday. This was the day we would spend doing "mama's thing". See, mama has gained a little weight now that his approaching 30 and needs new work clothes desperately. So daddy wanted to let her go shopping and she was soooo excited. (why am I talking in the 3rd person? Sorry, I will stop now.) Anyway, I really did have big plans about this shopping trip and also wanted to get started on the kids winters wardrobe.


Ha.


Chloe had bigger plans than shopping. Try running up and down every set of stairs she came across as we walked down the 55 miles of Riverwalk. And ya'll...that's ALOT of steps. And they are made of brick, and stone, and cement. I could just picture the ambulance ride in my head. She just wouldn't stop. Why wouldn't she stop??


Then, we decided to throw in the towel on that and bring them to the small Children's Museum.


I was impressed by this. It was much smaller than the one in Houston but much more age appropriate for Chloe and she had a blast!! But, low and behold the day couldn't begin to smooth out...oh no. We forgot the camera.


Luckily, the museum was almost directly across the street from our hotel. So, we would just run right over there, get the camera, let the kids rest their feet and then go and meet up with my sis in law and her family for a boat ride on the Riverwalk.


Ha.


Chloe somehow found an unprotected light bulb in the hotel room that had apparently been burning constantly for the last 55 days and TOUCHED it. The child screamed like someone was cutting her head off. I freaked! "What is wrong my sweet girl? WHAT IS WRONG?! Show momma what you did to your hand, please show momma. Did you smash your fingers? I swear you are not in trouble, JUST SHOW ME! Oh sweetie, you burned yourself. Oh honey, that is gonna HURT." And hurt it did. And scream she did, for at least an hour.


Ok, over the burn...


Missed the boat ride and visit with sis in law....do I even need to elaborate on the rest of Saturday? Didn't think so.


Sunday. SeaWorld. THE BIG DAY. It is evident as of early in the morning that Ray and I are much more excited about this day than Chloe is. And Hunter, well he's just along for the ride.


It did turn out to be a pretty awesome day though. Once we convinced Chloe that what she was seeing was, in fact, real...she was super stoked! We ran around that park like mad men. We rode everything she was big enough for (which was just enough), we say every show and ended up arriving at each arena at the perfect time (we laughed so hard we cried together at the sea lions), and she got to pet the dolphins (she is convinced she will never reach a higher point in her whole entire life!)!


I am very grateful that my husband and I were able to have this opportunity with the kids. We don't get to get away with them much more than the trips home to Louisiana so this was definitely an experience for us.


You know, I do feel way more exhausted now than I was before "vacation". I guess that goes along with the territory...right?


One more thing before I go, I would love to hear your thoughts...what is the best family vacation you ever had as a child? I love to hear every one's stories. My husband has lots because his parents took them on tons of vacations. My parents believed vacation was for adults so we never ever went on a family vacation...maybe this is why I am so fascinated by others' stories.


Hope you all enjoyed your weekend as much as we did.

Until next time...CNS

Happy Birthday To A New Friend and An Old One...

Happy Birthday to my new blog friend, Mama Belle. Hope it was a great day and your upcoming year is filled with joy and greatness.

Also, it was by bestest friend from high school, Annette's 30th birthday last week. All the girls from high school got together for a "Death of the 20s" party on Saturday night as we will ALL be turning the big 3-0 in the next few months. Including myself but we won't talk about all that now will we 'cause this is my blog and I can make rules like that!

Let me just tell you how good it felt to get out with old friends. It was AMAZING. To say that I don't get out much is quite the understatement. And let me tell you, it was theraputic. We talked, laughed, danced, drank and just had a plain ole good time. Happy birthday Annette! You are one of my oldest and dearest and my life would not be the same without you. There are times when I might not have made it without you. So thank you for being you. Have a great year! May 30 bring you much happiness and peace!!!

Not much going on other than that. We are taking the kids to Seaworld this weekend in San Antonio so that should be fun.

Sorry to bore you all with this post but I did not want to miss a chance to give a shout out of birthday wishes to my new friend and my dearest friend!!

Life is good!

Until next time...CNS